Mega Mobius
by Vividoll
Summary: What happens when the entire Sonic gang all go to Japan? UTTER CHAOS! (SatAMAoStHSUSX Crossover)
1. Never mess w Sonic when he's hung over

Chapter One: Never Mess With Sonic When He's Hung Over.

Vividoll: KON-NA-NA-CHI-WA!!! _Hajimemashite _to the first chapter of "Mega Mobius! This fic is loosely based on the "MegaTokyo" webcomic by Fred Ghallager.

I do not in any way own MegaTokyo or STH, but Both Kotone and Xiaoran are mine. You may use them, but please give me credit. BTW, Kotone is my self-insertion character on Sonic Vegimite, so yes, she's meant to be like me.

WRITTEN APOLOGY: I WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE FOR BOTH ME AND MY SISTER ROUGEFAN FOR BEING ARROGANT BITCHES TO LAISEZZ FAIRE. I WOULD LIKE TO SAY THAT WE BOTH FCKED UP BIG TIME AND WHAT WE SAID WAS WRONG.

THE SAGA BEGINS...

"Come on, let us in! We're part of this show!"

"Sonic, just calm down, it's just the lager talking…"

"Let us in before I suplex you!"

Sonic, Tails, and Rouge were outside of the E3 Video Game convention trying to get in. Unfortunately, Sonic had eaten their passes on a bet previously at the bar. Sonic was drunkenly slurring death threats at the security guard, who was watching in amusement, since his weapon happened to be a half-eaten banana that was starting to smell a little bit.

"Sonic, Please, just let's go, You're gonna get us all three arrest- Hey! There's Kotone-chan!"

Rouge was pointing at a purple and green fox with two tails, wearing a bow that looked like a Totoro head, and a pair of goggles.

"Hey! Ruji-san! Sonikku-kun! OMFG!!! **SHIPPO-KUN!!!**"

(A/N: "Shippo" is the Japanese translation of "Tails")

"YAAAAAAAAAH!!!" Tails took off as fast as he could to avoid the crazy little vixen who was constantly chasing him whenever she saw him.

"Hee hee hee… Run, bitch, RUUUUUUUN!!!" Sonic called.

Tails was flying as fast as his twin tails would carry him without burning up from the combined G-forces and wind resistance. Kotone was slowly but surely gaining on him; until finally, with a short burst of speed, she caught him in a crushing embrace that even rivaled a boa constrictor's killing tactic.

"RRRRG… EEEE… GRK! Sonic, help me!" Tails choked.

"Heh heh. You're on your own, now li'l bro."

"Some Gak! big brother you are!"

"Christ already, I'LL do it!" Said Rouge as she stole the security guard's baton.

"HEY!" He yelled.

"Keep your pants on, Pig! I've gotta get him outta there before she squeezes his little guts out through his mouth!"

"Eew…" Said Sonic, who was imagining that scene.

Rouge lifted that baton, brought it down fast, and… drove it between the two foxes, using the baton like a crowbar.

"EEEE… _GOD_ that hurts!" Tails said. By now, his face was blue and his eyes were bulging out.

"Oh, shut up! It's either this or let her crush your ribcage into bone meal!"

With lots of difficulty, and a grinding crack, she got Kotone off of Tails.

"Hweeh-HWEEH Hweeh-HWEEH!" Tails was gasping for breath. "Sweet oxygen!" The little kitsune gasped.

"Tails? You look different." Sonic said.

Looking down, Tails saw that Kotone had squeezed at least an inch off his waist. Unfortunately, it was now in his head, so he looked something like a Super-Deformed anime character.

"GREAT MERCIFUL CRAP!" Tails shrieked "My body!"

"Hold on." Said Rouge as she walked over and squeezed his head as hard as she could.

"GREAT _HOLY_ MERCIFUL CRAP! THIS IS EVEN WORSE!"

Tails did have that inch off his waist… and also an inch to spare.

"Uhhh.. Sorry." Said Rouge, giving him a softer squeeze to the body.

"GREAT, _HOLY,** MIGHTY**_, MERCIFUL CRAP! I'M BACK TO NORMAL!!!"

"Stop saying that!" Said Sonic.

"Sorry. But once the momentum of the merciful crap starts to increase, it's hard to stop it."

Everyone facefaulted. Then Rouge got up and looked at Kotone.

"Oh, by the way, What are you doing here, Kotone-chan?"

"Are you kidding? I'm a Sega executive!"

"WTF? Are you SERIOUS?"

Sonic got up from the ground. "OMG! I thought you were competing for that job with Xiaoran-kun!"

"Well, I was. But he's working at a lower position."

"Why?" asked Tails.

"Ummm…"

_**Flashback**_

"I hope you enjoy your trip to China, Xiao!" Said Kotone, putting one last strip of duct tape on Xiaoran's mouth.

"Mmmmph!" said Xiaoran. He was a dark orange fox, also two-tailed, with Asian looking eyes and a stout stature with VERY short stubby legs. He was tied up with an extension cord, and his mouth had a tennis ball duct taped into it.

Kotone slammed the hood on Knuckles' car closed, and watched it ride down Pixel Lane.

"Hasta la vista, Baby!" She yelled, then broke into insane laughter.

_**End Flashback**_

"Let's just say I had a very effective competitive strategy." Said Kotone, sweatdropping and nervously scratching the back of her head.

"That still doesn't solve the problem of HOW TO GET IN!" Sonic yelled.

"Hey! I've got an idea! said Tails.

"Plot hole in Three… Two… One…" said Rouge.

**30 MINUTES LATER…**

"Who are you?" Said the security guard.

"We're the maintenance persons." Said Sonic. "We're here to fix the air conditioner."

Everyone had donned orange uniforms reading "Harry's Maintenance: We repair what your husband fixed."

"But it ain't broken."

"Oh, it will be."

"Okay, right this way!" said the guard.

"Hee hee… He fell for it!" said Sonic.

He led them through the back hallways into a dark room.

"Hey! This isn't-"

The light came on revealing fourteen other security guards, all wearing brass knuckles and brandishing their batons.

"Gulp… Oh, (censored)…" Said Sonic.

End Chapter one.

Vividoll: DUN DUN DUN! Ooh, cliffhanger! What will happen to Sonic and Co.? Will Kotone come to save them? Will Xiaoran ever get out of Knuckles' trunk? Will the one hand clapping riddle ever be solved? Find out next time, when that last question will remain unanswered.


	2. Delta Airlines: As if YOU could do bette...

Chapter the second: Delta Airlines: As if YOU could do better!

VVD: HELL-O-O-O-O-O-O-O!!! And welcome back to Mega Mobius! I should explain right now that I am a HUGE _Otaku_ (Anime-crazed individual) and I wish to give a public service announcement on behalf of anybody who has at any time been tortured by butchered Japanese Animation.

_Sonic: Kids, I'm here to warn you about something that will kill you faster than drugs or guns: The English-dubbed version of _Nausicaa of the Valley of Wind_. This dub was SO freakin' bad, that The Great Miyazaki-sama himself told his _Amerika-jin_ fans not to see the English version. It's not even the same movie. In fact, this version was SUCH a stinkbomb, that the author of this fic hasn't even watched it. She's just working with what all serious _Otaku_ say on message boards. If you are a true _Otaku_, you WILL NOT watch the butchered version. It is a _SIN_ to look upon this raped masterpiece. If you have, get to a church confessional and confess your misdeed. There's still time. This also goes for the Edited DBZ, Cardcaptors, and the American TV version of Sailor Moon. _Arigato Gozaimasu

_A message from all _Otaku_ everywhere._

And NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW… Back to the funny stuff!

THE REAL CHAPTER 2

"Ungggh… jee-ZUS! What the hell did I drink?" Sonic woke up in an airplane seat.

"So you're up." Tails said next to him, reading a back issue of Popular Mechanics.

"Um… Why are we in a plane?"

"I wanted to check out un-dubbed anime." Said Rouge.

"I needed a break from Knuckles' trunk." Said Xiaoran from the row behind them.

"Otherwise there'd be no story." Tails said.

"You kidnapped me!" said a trussed Kotone. "But I really like being tied up by YOU, Shippo-kun."

"Of all the obsessed fangirls I could have, WHY did I get a bondage freak?"

"Why am _I_ here?" Sonic wanted to know.

"Well" said Tails, "I asked you if you wanted to come, and you puked, so I took that as a yes"

Meanwhile, a flight attendant strolled by to see Sonic making good use of the emergency phone.

"Um… Sir? It is against airline policy for me to let you strangle your sidekick with that phone cord."

"Just give me five more minutes with him."

Suddenly, Amy pops up from across the aisle with Shadow.

"SONIKKU-KUN! Fancy meeting you here!"

Sonic continued to strangle Tails, only now, he was also whacking him in the head with the phone. By the time the stewardess got Sonic to calm down, Tails had a bloody nose, a bloody lip, a black eye, and a ring of bruises around his little neck.

"Et tu Sonic? Then fall Tails!" Then Tails fainted.

Suddenly, the captain came on the speaker.

"Good afternoon, Passengers, and welcome to Delta Airlines! This marks our 15th no-crashes mark, and I believe we've broken the-"

There was a barely audible whisper in the background.

"Strike that, This marks the beginning of an attempted 15 no-crashes streak. Enjoy your flight, and if you're sitting on the right side of the plane, please look to your LEFT!"

The plane began to taxi… then broke down. The speaker was still on.

"Oh, (REEEEEALLY long drawn out bleep with Sonic attempting to cover Tails' ears, though he's passed out.)!!!"

"Um… sir, you have to let go of the button…"

"Oh, Shi-" It cut off right there.

Our heroes were sitting in their seats wondering what to do while the plane was grounded. Finally Sonic sighed.

"I wish I were out there."

"Why?" asked Rouge. "Scared of flying?"

"No, I wanna see them repair the plane! Those must be some big-ass jumper cables!"

"You moron, they don't use jumper cables on a-"

As Rouge spoke, a flatbed pickup drove by with a HUGE pair of jumper cables.

"0o I'll be damned…" Said Rouge.

(A/N: Yes I KNOW that was a stupid joke, but how could I resist?)

Suddenly, Tails woke up.

"THE SKY IS FULL OF WHAT LOOKS LIKE HUGE BATS! HOLY JEEZUS WHAT ARE THESE GODDAMN ANIMALS? YAAAAAAAAAAH! THERE'S ONE RIGHT THERE!"

Tails began to whack Rouge over and over again with the aforementioned magazine.

"Ow! Gad-YAAAH! STOP THAT, YOU VULPINE BERSERKER!"

Tails dropped his magazine and clung to Sonic.

"Jesus God Almighty, look at that big one! She's spotted us!"

Sonic just looked at him and blinked twice.

"Tails, please, just go to sleep until the ride is over and you'll be fine by the time we get to our destination."

"I cannot sl33p with the forces of 3vi1 sitting next to us!"

"Oh, crap." Said Shadow. "He's speaking L33t."

"I can handle this." Said Sonic, and he turned to Tails.

"0 4y, 1i1 br0, j0o 5 0ur $$3$, 50 /-y 0'7 j0o 74 3 1i7713 4p 0/, 0 4y?"

(Loose Translation: Okay, your work here is done, so rest up some, capice?)

Tails Shook his head. "0, I (407 5133p u7i1 I -4/3 R0x0r3 t3h B0x0rz 0f 7h3 3/i1 ()3Z. I3, f00lz, i3!!!

(Loose Translation: No, I must finish the adversary! PREPARE TO DEFEND YOURSELF!!!)

"0! 137 /3 74 3 0/3r 4 J0o. I 5773 1I 3 Y0urz, B477l3 /0u1 01y 134 70 /4D B34td0wnz."

(Loose Translation: No! You are too weak! You would only be defeated! Let me take your place!)

"() , G'ig#7."

(Loose Translation: Okay. Good Night.)

Suddenly, The intercom came on.

"This is your Captain, Um... I've got good news and bad news..."

"Oh, (Shirt W/out the "r")..." Said Sonic

Vividoll: Doncha just HATE Cliffhangers?


End file.
